it comes to me when

as I realize I'm alive, and like when it comes to me when death is sitting in the living room, the most ordinary thing in the universe... I realize I'm alive, and that is perfectly extraordinary.

Sometimes it comes to me, my chest expanding like I can't breathe enough.. It doesn't hurt though - it's just like a bunch of extra air that wakes me up with a gentle punch and opens my eyes a bit wide. It catches me off guard as I realize I'm alive, and that is extraordinary. Sometimes it comes to me on the metro line, headphone soundtrack snythesizes my heart strings in time: this body imagines it's dancing right there to the beat in it's seat, or skipping along the street, like Beyonce whenever she feels like kicking it flash-mob style – wherever she damn well pleases. That's me, when it comes to me. Sometimes it comes to me as a fluttering thought of the butterfly friend of my youth who was crushed too soon, her wings take flight in my memory of her and the adventures I take on her behalf, we fly. When it comes to me, it is perfectly ordinary that we fly. Sometimes it comes to me when I hear the words "peanut butter" and sometimes when you're sitting next to me on the couch and lean in close to talk, wine and electricity pulling us in, it comes to me. When the words of a friend's song become a soundwave that courses through my body like a tidal wave washing over me, it comes to me. Like when in silence, it comes to me. A pang of love for the smile in the mirror. Paddle through the blue, still like glass but gliding. Photo of mystery captured. Tears of laughter. High of the mountain top. Sigh after making love... it comes to me. Sometimes it comes to me, a poem wrapped up with twine in a bow, complete, before like a gift it's set free through shivers and goosebumps while the lightened soul passes to the world as I realize I'm alive, and like when it comes to me when death is sitting in the living room, the most ordinary thing in the universe... I realize I'm alive, and that is perfectly extraordinary. It comes to me, I'm alive.

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"Body and Wine Podcast: Conversations on Sex and Spirituality" - Charlie Gray interviews guests as they share experiences with sexuality and belief. 

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